Hi All, I’ve Missed You!

On October 9, 2021October 9, 2021 By Stacey at myjigsawjournalIn Jigsaw Puzzling, Miscellaneous38 Comments

Hey everyone! Thought I’d drop in to tell you all that I’m still alive. 🙂 You’ve probably forgotten all about me, but I’m still here!

Things are still crazy around here, and I have barely done any puzzling at all in more than a year, but I haven’t given up completely, just took a much needed mental health break for a bit. I’m not embarrassed or ashamed to tell you that I suffer from severe depression and anxiety, and it has been overwhelming; especially with the worldwide panorama…panatella…panamiga…panini…pandemic…plague – whatever you want to call it. To be honest, the last couple of years have been extremely difficult for me and I needed to take time for myself to process everything.

I’m still struggling, but doing my best – and that’s really all I can do.

Hubby is well and whole and fortunately/unfortunately working from home more often than not. I’m incredibly grateful that he has that opportunity and is able to stay safer at home – but also a little miffed that our house is so small that the only place he has to work is on top of my puzzle board. I started working on a puzzle a few months ago (one of those 500 piece puzzles that is really 10-12 smaller puzzles that you assemble individually), but wandered away from it and haven’t been able to go back. I’m trying to work out a way to get back to puzzling, because to be honest I’ve basically been in bed for the last year and I need to try to get myself out of this hole I’ve dug myself into.

My boys are both healthy and well, and I’m extremely grateful for that – more than I can possibly say. My daughter had a terrible car crash earlier this year and seriously broke/injured her leg. I roused myself out of bed and cared for her at her home for a couple of months until she was able to be up and around on her own. She had multiple surgeries and is still healing and dealing with the trauma and injury. But she is alive and otherwise healthy and we are grateful beyond measure.

I’m still on multiple pain meds 24/7, which I need to function, and they are part of the reason the depression became overwhelming. Once my heart condition made itself known I was no longer able to take my medications for depression – when choosing between happiness and a heartbeat I chose the latter. 😉 But then I lost my mother, Covid happened, my husband was hospitalized, and it was just too much for me to bear. I always tried to keep this blog lighthearted and fun, and it seemed that I was no longer able to do that. I had to take care of myself first and foremost, and that’s why I took a break from puzzling and blogging.

But I’m trying to get myself back now. I won’t be posting daily again for a while probably, but I won’t be gone for months at a time either. I have to figure out this new format that WordPress has for posting (I DO NOT LIKE IT AT ALL!), so my posts will probably look different until I figure it all out. Plus I still have to figure out how puzzling is going to work with hubby hogging my space! Please have patience with me if you can.

You’ve all become friends that past several years since I started this blog, and I truly missed talking to you all every day through my posts and the comments. I hope I haven’t been gone too long and that some of you are still hanging around. Please let me know how you are, I’d love to hear from you! 💗

*I’m adding a link to a previous post I wrote about mental health. I just re-read it, and I think I did a pretty good job talking about how we need to be more open and talk about our struggles. No Puzzling In Progress

A Break…Hopefully a Short One

On August 18, 2020August 18, 2020 By Stacey at myjigsawjournalIn Miscellaneous23 Comments

I won’t be posting for a bit. Somewhat similar to what happened last year, someone I love is in the hospital, and my focus is required both there (where I cannot be) and here at home taking care of my family.

My husband is the one in the hospital right now, but unlike last year I cannot be with him or even visit. My hope and prayer is that he will be home very soon. Until he is home and we know that all is well, I will be taking a break.

Here’s hoping it’s a short one.

Such a Struggle!

On August 12, 2020 By Stacey at myjigsawjournalIn Jigsaw Puzzling, Miscellaneous13 Comments

man using laptop on table against white background

I’ve been trying for an hour to set up my new computer and get myself onto my blog, and I gotta tell ya – frustrated isn’t quite a harsh enough word for my feelings. My struggle to get myself to the place where I was logged in to WordPress and able to get onto my site has probably caused quite a rise in my blood pressure. My cardiologist would not be happy.

Anyway, I’m finally here and ready to get today’s post up, and afterwards I cross my heart that I will – at last – get my butt back to the table and start a new puzzle. I need to get myself there for many reasons, not the least of which is lowering my blood pressure back to acceptable levels. 😉

Since I finished the Wizard of Oz puzzle I have not put together any puzzle pieces at all. Anxiety, depression, pain, exhaustion have all played their roles in keeping me out of the puzzle room. And I now find myself overwhelmed by the thought of starting any puzzle larger than 300 pieces.

When I finished the Oz puzzle I chose a 1000 piece collage that was to be next; it sat on the board for a couple of days, then my daughter and I spent the weekend making masks, and then I spent Monday and Tuesday doing absolutely nothing. Now, the thought of starting that collage I’d previously chosen makes me uneasy. I don’t know how to describe it to those who haven’t dealt with anxiety, but it feels awful; racing heart, taking deep breaths and taking them too quickly, a sense of dread, a pressure in my chest, etc. – in short, it really, really sucks.

And so, because of that, the next puzzle will be a 200 piece kids puzzle, and then, perhaps a 300 piece; and we’ll see how it goes from there. You might want to get used to seeing smaller piece counts for a while, because that seems to be as much as I can handle at the moment.

So here’s to hoping I can get used to how this new computer works, and happy puzzling today for all of us!

So Very Tired….

On August 9, 2020 By Stacey at myjigsawjournalIn Miscellaneous6 Comments

Sorry everybody, yesterday was another day of making masks – I never even opened up my laptop! I had a puzzle on the board ready to start sorting it, but my daughter came over early in the morning and wanted to make more masks for herself (and me), and we spent HOURS at it.

When she left, I’m not gonna lie, I laid down on the couch and took a nap. I got up, ate dinner, and promptly went back to sleep until 2:00 am. Yikes. I was tired y’all!

She’s coming back over today to finish up a few more masks – girls’ gotta have some choices – so the only thing on my board at the moment is the serger (sewing machine) and a bunch of fabric. Tomorrow, hopefully, I’ll have enough energy to sit and start a new puzzle, because it is definitely not happening today.

My Apologies…Sort Of

On July 21, 2020July 21, 2020 By Stacey at myjigsawjournalIn Miscellaneous9 Comments

I left all you puzzle fans high and dry for the last several days, and you have my apologies…..sort of.

I needed a few mental health days; and though I do NOT apologize either for needing them or for taking them, I am sorry that I didn’t give you all a heads up first. Unfortunately I cannot say “all is well”, but it’s marginally better – enough to get back to my puzzles and My Jigsaw Journal at the very least.

So, back to the puzzles we all know and love. I will be back to the puzzle board today and working on a puzzle. Hope you all have been well, I’ve missed you! 💖