Sorry Guys…

My apologies for not giving all my faithful readers a heads up, life kinda took me over for a bit and it was all just too much. I took a very much needed mental health break, including a trip back to my home state of Michigan to visit loved ones.

I haven’t touched a puzzle since the last time I posted, on June 2nd. But today, at the very least, I’m back on my computer and sitting at my puzzle table.

Depression and anxiety are no joke, and dealing with them on a daily basis sucks big time. Life just overwhelmed me; hubby had another surgery and I had to drive him everywhere – my anxiety about being on the road went absolutely crazy. That made the depression worse and it was just an infinite circle of one feeding the other. I’m sure that being away from my puzzles didn’t help, but I honestly spent almost all of the last 6 weeks in bed and jigsaw puzzles weren’t even on my mind.

But at least I’ve chosen my next puzzle, a collage of canines that make me smile. Plus, it’s the smallest piece count I have here at the moment (750) other than a 500 piece of 12 shaped puzzles that I’m just not in the mood for right now. I will try to get it sorted today, and may even start on it – but no promises.

So how are you all? Working on some fantastic puzzles? I’d love to hear from you!

*My sincerest apologies for disappearing again, I’m just doing the best I can.*

Authors In Progress

Authors – Re-marks – 1000 pieces

The current Re-marks puzzle I’m working on is very good quality and much more entertaining than the last few puzzles I’ve done – what a relief! I was starting to think that perhaps I should give puzzles a rest for a while.

I haven’t done well in choosing which ones to assemble this month and out of the five puzzles I’ve done so far only one of them was truly enjoyable. I need to stop picking puzzles based on what I think I need for the blog and start choosing ones I actually want to do in the moment (which seems to be easier said than done for me).

Of course it really isn’t the puzzles, it’s me and the state of my mind and body. I’m feeling awful and having to take all my pain meds all day, which makes me feel groggy and stupid – not the best for sitting at the puzzle table. And of course there’s the anxiety and depression, it doesn’t help matters at all. Having mental health issues along with physical health problems just plain ol’ sucks.

I’ll just keep plugging away, even though my puzzling has slowed down quite a bit. What’s the old expression? Fake it till you make it.

Hi All, I’ve Missed You!

Hey everyone! Thought I’d drop in to tell you all that I’m still alive. 🙂 You’ve probably forgotten all about me, but I’m still here!

Things are still crazy around here, and I have barely done any puzzling at all in more than a year, but I haven’t given up completely, just took a much needed mental health break for a bit. I’m not embarrassed or ashamed to tell you that I suffer from severe depression and anxiety, and it has been overwhelming; especially with the worldwide panorama…panatella…panamiga…panini…pandemic…plague – whatever you want to call it. To be honest, the last couple of years have been extremely difficult for me and I needed to take time for myself to process everything.

I’m still struggling, but doing my best – and that’s really all I can do.

Hubby is well and whole and fortunately/unfortunately working from home more often than not. I’m incredibly grateful that he has that opportunity and is able to stay safer at home – but also a little miffed that our house is so small that the only place he has to work is on top of my puzzle board. I started working on a puzzle a few months ago (one of those 500 piece puzzles that is really 10-12 smaller puzzles that you assemble individually), but wandered away from it and haven’t been able to go back. I’m trying to work out a way to get back to puzzling, because to be honest I’ve basically been in bed for the last year and I need to try to get myself out of this hole I’ve dug myself into.

My boys are both healthy and well, and I’m extremely grateful for that – more than I can possibly say. My daughter had a terrible car crash earlier this year and seriously broke/injured her leg. I roused myself out of bed and cared for her at her home for a couple of months until she was able to be up and around on her own. She had multiple surgeries and is still healing and dealing with the trauma and injury. But she is alive and otherwise healthy and we are grateful beyond measure.

I’m still on multiple pain meds 24/7, which I need to function, and they are part of the reason the depression became overwhelming. Once my heart condition made itself known I was no longer able to take my medications for depression – when choosing between happiness and a heartbeat I chose the latter. 😉 But then I lost my mother, Covid happened, my husband was hospitalized, and it was just too much for me to bear. I always tried to keep this blog lighthearted and fun, and it seemed that I was no longer able to do that. I had to take care of myself first and foremost, and that’s why I took a break from puzzling and blogging.

But I’m trying to get myself back now. I won’t be posting daily again for a while probably, but I won’t be gone for months at a time either. I have to figure out this new format that WordPress has for posting (I DO NOT LIKE IT AT ALL!), so my posts will probably look different until I figure it all out. Plus I still have to figure out how puzzling is going to work with hubby hogging my space! Please have patience with me if you can.

You’ve all become friends that past several years since I started this blog, and I truly missed talking to you all every day through my posts and the comments. I hope I haven’t been gone too long and that some of you are still hanging around. Please let me know how you are, I’d love to hear from you! 💗

*I’m adding a link to a previous post I wrote about mental health. I just re-read it, and I think I did a pretty good job talking about how we need to be more open and talk about our struggles. No Puzzling In Progress

My Apologies…Sort Of

I left all you puzzle fans high and dry for the last several days, and you have my apologies…..sort of.

I needed a few mental health days; and though I do NOT apologize either for needing them or for taking them, I am sorry that I didn’t give you all a heads up first. Unfortunately I cannot say “all is well”, but it’s marginally better – enough to get back to my puzzles and My Jigsaw Journal at the very least.

So, back to the puzzles we all know and love. I will be back to the puzzle board today and working on a puzzle. Hope you all have been well, I’ve missed you! 💖

No Puzzling In Progress

I’d show you a picture of an empty board today, but to be honest the puzzle that was in progress three days ago is still sitting there. It is complete, but it’s still on the board and I haven’t started anything else. 😐

To be completely honest, I’m in the middle of a major depressive funk that has me doing almost nothing all day long. Usually I don’t discuss things like this, but I think part of the problem with mental health issues is that we don’t discuss them – and I’ve seriously had enough of pretending to be happy and positive all the time.

Many of us around the world have depression, and there’s absolutely nothing wrong with having it or admitting we have it. By talking about it, we find out that although it may seem as though we’re alone – we are not. And also that having depression or anxiety isn’t a failing, it doesn’t make you weak, it doesn’t mean you’re a “mental case”; it just means that you’re human and you may have a chemical imbalance. Just because you put the word “mental” in front of “illness” doesn’t mean you’re crazy.

I’m not crazy. I may love jigsaw puzzles to an almost unhealthy degree, but I am not crazy. I’m depressed. I have serious anxiety problems – still not crazy.

A couple of years ago I developed an “electrical problem” in my heart. It caused a serious rapid heartbeat called tachycardia that had me hospitalized twice and in jeopardy of having a heart attack or a stroke. Since then I’ve had to take medication to keep the electrical system in my heart working properly; the only problem is that it cannot be taken with antidepressants. I’d been on antidepressants for many years, but in the choice between being less depressed and having a heartbeat – you can imagine which one I chose.

So, with the changes in pain medications that cause me serious problems and more pain, the world in the midst of a pandemic costing many lives, and a host of other small things – I’m having an extremely tough time right now. And if we don’t talk about things like being anxious or depressed – or both – things aren’t ever going to change or get better.

So instead of telling you what’s in progress today and pretending that all is well; I’m telling you that all is not well, nothing is in progress, and I am just doing the best I can.